Dear Haya,
I’m a university student struggling with stammering and public speaking anxiety. A few days back my professor assigned me a class presentation, which I really want to do well.
However, my stammering issue and fear of speaking before the class leaves me feeling extremely anxious and overwhelmed. I feel like I will be judged and lose my confidence.
Can you please help me understand how I can work around this situation?
— A struggling student
Dear struggling student,
Thank you for sharing such a real honest and relatable experience, something so many people struggle with.
I hear how much you struggle with stammering and how public speaking triggers intense anxiety for you. But at the same time, I’m also hearing that you want to improve.
First of all, please know that having a stammer does not mean you lack intelligence, capability or confidence. Right now, the fear of speaking and being judged is overwhelming your nervous system, pushing it into a freeze response. That reaction is not a weakness, its your body responding to a perceived threat.
Let me put this clearly. Your professor assigning you a class presentation is not a punishment, but an opportunity.
Yes, it feels scary. The fear of stammering and being judged can make you feel frozen and overwhelmed, but growth does not happen by avoiding fear. The only way to get better at something is by doing it. The only way out is through it.
This is what we call exposure therapy. Not forcing yourself harshly, but feeling the fear and doing it anyway with preparation. Courage is not the absence of fear: true courage lies in taking action despite it.
Few things to keep in mind while you do this:
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Prepare: The key is not to go into this rushed or unprepared. Prepare thoroughly. Practice your presentation out loud and multiple times — preferably alone, in front of the mirror, and then with one trusted person. Record yourself to normalise hearing your own voice. Slow your pace intentionally. Pauses are allowed. In fact, pauses often make a speaker sound more confident and grounded.
Regulate your nervous system: Before you present, regulate your body. Do this by taking slow deep breaths, exhaling longer than you inhale and telling yourself you are ok and safe. This signals safety to your nervous system and often reduces speech blocks. Remember: Anxiety intensifies stammering, not the other way around.
Separate your speech from your self worth: Remember, your speaking skills are not reflective of your self worth. A presentation is about your ideas, your understanding, and your effort, not about speaking perfectly.
Brief your professor: Inform your pressor that you experience a stammer and public speaking anxiety. This is not weakness, it is self advocacy. Many educators are far more supportive than we expect them to be.
Practice self-compassion and set realistic expectations: Be easy with yourself as you transition through this journey. This is your first time, it wont be ideal. Public speaking is a skill that gets better with exposure and repetition.
Every time you show up, even with a shaky voice, you are teaching your nervous system that you are safe. That is how confidence is built. You are not failing because you are afraid, you are growing because you are willing to try, and that is how winners are built.
You got this!
— Haya
Haya Malik is a psychotherapist, Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) practitioner, corporate well-being strategist and trainer with expertise in creating organisational cultures focused on well-being and raising awareness around mental health.
Send her your questions by filling this form or email to [email protected]
Note: The advice and opinions above are those of the author and specific to the query. We strongly recommend our readers consult relevant experts or professionals for personalised advice and solutions. The author and Geo.tv do not assume any responsibility for the consequences of actions taken based on the information provided herein. All published pieces are subject to editing to enhance grammar and clarity.
